We only bloody did it AND we’re still together. We made it to 6 months!
Yes sacrifices have been made, I’ve resorted to cutting my hair shorter to help those frantic mornings, no matter the weather I only wear t-shirts as jumpers don’t fit anymore (baby weight IS A THING) and my toe nails got to the point that they were cutting through every pair of socks.
Both of us look dishevelled, I say both, I mean me – I think someone threw some money at me recently while I was bent down tying my laces (I know I know, in parent world by 6 months all my trainers should now be Velcro for time efficiency) but hey, that pound went straight in my pocket, babies are expensive.
I thought I’d read my own blog back to see the journey so far (and boost the views of course), I can’t believe how much he’s changed already, I guess when you’re fully immersed in it it’s easy to forget. Just yesterday he was pooping himself and crying irrationally….. oh wait, he still does that.
As I write this I’m blending a parsnip, working out rationing like I’m in the
war and getting my head around weaning. It seems every new chapter brings a load more questions and frantic googling – which I’m now a pro at just FYI . But nothing prepared me for the increased poop stench. The other day it was like he’d eaten the incredible hulk. It smelt like someone had pooped in an old shoe and left it fermenting in the sun, eaten it, then pooped it out again. I’m scared of the outcome once he discovers curry.
Swimming is the latest addition to his already busy social calendar. Being taught to swim at a young age and being a confident swimmer meant I really wanted to instil that in him early as well. Turns out he’s a better swimmer than Tash already. Won’t be long before he’s rescuing that rubber brick.
The house now resembles a musical obstacle course. Everything making some kind of repetitive annoying jingle, I swear they hide the off switch on purpose. Not to mention when the batteries start to go. Christ. This should be used in interrogation techniques. Play me wheels on the bus at half speed and 20 minutes later I’d be telling my darkest secrets like the time I burnt the old fella on a hairdryer. Trying to navigate my living room without setting something off is a skill in itself, add darkness into the mix and recently watching Making A Murderer and I’m now probably one the worlds leading spy’s.
Sleep continues to tease us, you horrible Mistress. Like National Rails train service there is no consistency – and all my seats smell of urine and vomit. We thought we had it nailed, but before we could finish our celebratory HOT microwave meal, he was awake and we seem to be back at the beginning.
So far it’s sleep training 0 Rafferty 47456843
He’s frustrated at the world because he can’t crawl, walk, play xbox, work Tinder etc. So there will often be outbursts of moaning and rage when he can’t reach his toys or banging on his laptop angrily at the lights – I’ve explained to him Virgin’s wifi isn’t the best, but he has a short temper when it comes to internet services.
One of the most frustrating things about parenting and a topic I have to stay quiet on. Is that my car, my lovely clean car has now become the main form of transport to ferry the family around. I don’t understand why that’s a problem I hear you say? Well, Tash has somehow managed to hit every corner, smash the indicator, scuff every wheel and scratch the interior – obviously none of it her fault, it those other pesky road users (whispers: she reversed her car into the front of the house a few weeks ago. I’ll say no more) not to mention its another place for her to store baby stuff.
How my son has so much ‘stuff’ is beyond me, half the living room is covered in a coloured foam mat with bouncy, walking, sitting and sensory gadgets overflowing.
But all this aside, this is my favourite time to be a dad so far. He’s started to develop a little personality. Admittedly he has us twisted round his chubby little saliva covered fingers and knows exactly what to do to make us react and get what he wants. But that’s ok, one smile and all is forgiven. The way when he sees me when I come home from work, his little eyes light up and it gives me that big toothy smile, makes my heart melt. The stresses of the day just become but a distant memory.
Oh yeah he also said his first word yesterday…………. Honourable